I found this

We had state testing ALL day yesterday. I had students that weren't necessarily mine. ALL DAY. The girl in the front row may never ask me a question again for I cannot handle telling her "this is a test, I cannot tell you if you're wrong or right."

I let some of the kids play with my phone for a minute or two after the test. I found these tonight...






I'm probably fired. You think i could get canned for letting them run a muck after the test?

But seriously, I'm so glad she's not in my class.

Possibly the funniest person ever

I worked with this guy named Eric and we used to make fun of people who were really country. We'd spend whole shifts talking like trailer trash. Here is a letter I just received from him on myspace. I laugh harder every time I read it:


Ya'll stop making Bobbi Dale mad!!!!! Stopit Now!!

Dear Lurlene Marie and Cecil, Yall best not let meemaw know that Bobby Dale farted in line at Luby's after the cornbread festival last Sundee. Yall been spreadin it around like honey butter all over yalls myspaces yall. I know yall told Peepaw it was the steamed collard greens the little oriental lady put in the winda' , but he aint stupid. He's just blind as a rooster. He can smell yall. Love yall, Billy Don

Ready for Monday!

I've crammed 3 weeks worth of "new teacher" prep into 4 days. I'm kicking myself for not taking before pictures of my new room. DUST. DISORGANIZATION.

Let's get started....

Welcome to my room:



Here is the student workstation. Everything is accounted for, so don't be stealin' no pencils, fool, I know where you work!:

Oh no, internet!! What do I do with no money to decorate???

I'll just staple crap (homemade construction paper crap) to the walls!!! Those are the rules that my classes made with their old teacher. Each one is a period...and each period has a COLOR! MORE EXCITING COLOR ORGANIZATION! I swear, 1st period is red and I have a red folder that I put their work in.:

My turn in baskets are UN-labeled...the humanity!

Here's what the kids see:


Here's what I see. Heaven in the form of COLOR COORDINATED TABLES! It took me FOREVER to get the tables right. From the front of the room, I can see ALL of their precious faces:



Let's look closer...

Here is Table A (the orange paper on the floor is where the front desks line up..because I'm all anal like that. Oh yeah, and each desk has a number, too. SO HAPPY!):

This is the lab station for group A:

And these are the goggles for table A, in the drawer for table A, with the orange label for table A!! The goggles were in a huge pile next to boxes of books under tons of dust.:

What's the plan for this week? Well, a make shift schedule box with a half written in schedule, I'll say!



Here's my computer. It's good to see that Dell and I are talking again. We had a major falling out after he decided to go all crazy on me and put any letters he wanted to when I typed. Conveniently right in the middle of a term paper. Now, if i were Dell, I'd be just fine after someone spilled a glass of water into my keys:


My desk... You people of the familial variety best reconize yo self? You know I gots ta see you on the regular!






Ok. Must. Sleep.

I'm just now leaving school..

The guy that was teaching before me was old fashioned to say the
least. Dust EVERYWHERE. Assignments in the most random, unorganized
places... ALL over the room. I completely revamped and I'm pissed I
didnt snap a before pic.

It's official, peeps

Nasty badge picture= salary

If you only knew...

******PUKE WARNING FOR WEAK BELLIED PREGGOS!!! :)*****

The short posts may become popular because I've just learned how to
blog from my phone!

Anyway, this is why my boss doesn't make the girls use the employee bathroom:

This is the traffic on my way to work

I SO spoke too soon!!!!!!!!!

I got me some employment up in her'!!!!!! At a high payin' establishment!!! The highest payin' school district in TAY-Haas to be exact!! YEEE HAW!


Seriously, don't ask me how:

THE INTERVIEW
(THURSDAY)

3:20PM- Left my subbing job early to get to the interview on time at 4:30PM.

3:21PM- Raced down stairs to get the hell out of dodge and "stumbled" into this equation...



WIDE LEG PANTS + HEELS - TIME / STAIRS= Inadvertently whaling water bottle into wall to save tail from possible -plegia.

In other words, I almost got crippled but bashed the water bottled to save my life!

(**Remember this.)

3:40PM- I am driving. All is good.

3:41PM- I am not moving. All is not good.

3:50PM- I am not freaking moving.

4:13PM- I have moved enough to see the wreck! The dumb, avoidable wreck! The wreck that involved people who are out to destroy me! Am forced to make a call to interviewees informing of my official lateness!? I am going to be LATE! Late to an interview. LATE I TELL YOU! STOP looking at me!!! Yes I'm yelling at nobody, but you're the one in the wreck!! YOU WRECKER!!!!

4:15PM- Am breathless. Have regained composure to call the people who will never hire me because I am late. Look down to grab phone and notice that my water bottle has suffered some damage from "The Crash of 3:21" , or so it will forever be known.

Aww...poor water bottle. Poor, defenseless, broken, w---hat the hell!!!?!?!?!

MY RESUME!!!? My SOAKED, RUINED, RESUME!!?!?!? I HATE YOU WATER BOTTLE!

4:40PM- I am late. My voice is quaking. Feel frazzled and unprepared. Have no resume because no resume is better then soaked resume. DOOM.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I got the job!