December 29, 2005

Out With the Old!!

The time has come, Blog-ladies and gents, for a work-shoe overhaul!

The last time I posted about my work shoes I received several encouraging comments that lead me to prolong their life. I am SO glad I did because they were great shoes....


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4 Shifts A Week

5 Hours A Shift

For 1 1/2 LONG years....

Shoes...You will be missed.

OK, OK...Enough sappy!! (Press stop above) Let's......

(Please Press Play:)

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I felt like I was walking on a cloud last night!!

With Born's New DRYZ Technology, my feet were the PERFECT temperature!

And the tractions not too shabby either...

I paid $30 (with a $50 g.c.) and it was MORE then worth it! I would have paid the full $80 in a heartbeat!

Overall, A+++++ for these awesome shoes!!

And so...... RIP old work friends:

December 27, 2005

Recap of 05!

Sooo...for those of you that have followed along, here's how it went:

June: Got my blog....

July: Got lots off blog friends....And had lots of cool fun posts!!

August: Dropped off the face because school started.

September: Attempted to find interesting school things to write about...

December: Finals at school and got really, really boring.

NOW: Am still really, really boring and all i post about is Mr. Wonderful...and how wonderful Mr. Wonderful is...and how excited I am to see Mr. Wonderful..and how Great it was to see Mr. Wonderful...

Have I mentioned that I'm excited to see him? Ok..Just checking.

Sorry for being such a slacker but it's the holidays....and I've been busy. I'll be thinking long and hard about some fun posts in the near future.

I hope you all are enjoying your holiday.

i'll let you know what my resolution will be....

December 26, 2005

Happy Holidays!

I hope you all had a Merry Christmas or a Happy Holiday....And I also hope you're getting ready for the New Year.

Any Resolutions you want to share with me?? :)

I'm off to fight the holiday traffic at the Mall...Wish me luck..and I'll see you soon!

Happy Holildays!!!

I'm top left... then dad, Step-mamma, brother...
THe rest are brothers, sisters and our favorite dogs!

December 23, 2005

Almost over....

Was anyone else not ready for Christmas this year? I feel like it came so I can't wait for it to be over.

The 2nd can't come soon enough! As if seeing MW weren't enough...I get to see my Mom and Stepdad too!!! HOORAY!! :)

December 20, 2005

Yay! It's here...

The magenta razr is here and it's WAY cuter in person! Much more vibrant then the pictures lead on.... It's AWESOME....

Grades are in.... 5 A's and 1 B.....3.8 GPA.



Now...time to make a ticker....anyone know a good site to use to make a ticker to countdown til I see MW!?

December 17, 2005

Early Christmas....

I sold my books back today and got 100bucks. I bought them for over 400.

With the dollars I have purchased HER!:

Yes, I'm a sellout...but it's PINK!!!


In other Gargantuanly WONDERFUL news...I am seeing MR. Wonderful in January!!! Praise the Lord! On January 2nd, around 10 am....Merry Late Christmas...I will be with Mr. Wonderful for 7 straight days. Not long enough..but I'll take it!


Can you tell I'm EXCITED!!??

Before I go, one last thing....

Remember when I told you about the adorable little boy that was in love with Dora? Well....i have been asked to persent to you the evidence...

Exibit A, HG reads the book:

Exibit B...Same Jammies...Same book...DIFFERENT PERSON!:

Just to remind you, these pictures were taken by a four year old. Within the span of about 45 minutes until everyone got dizzy from the flash. Two people CAUGHT on camera in less then 45 minutes! He would have read that book all day if we'd let him. It took everything in my power not to eat him to bits! So stinken cute!

December 13, 2005


"Oh ah! A place to stay..getch'a booty on tha floor toniiiigghhhtt...make-my-day!"

That's right! Party down, finals are OVAH! And I rocked! Good grades on all 6 classes and I'm done for a month!!!

I made it through in one piece, but am not sure what to say about the others....

This interesting collage of CRAP was once a desk to do work at. It is now my hamper thanks to finals week.:

This massive collection of dirty clothes was where I sat to do work at my "desk" is also now my hamper a la finals:

If you can make out the pillows and headboard on this badboy then you'll know that it was my bed.....Now? My desk e hamper con finals:


December 10, 2005

News And PICS! YAY

I've had several finals the last week and they ain't over til Tuesday. You may miss me until then. News on PFP.....Class was cancelled on Wednesday on account of our weird weather. It melted a refroze. People here in Somewhere USA cannot drive when there is ice. They think that normal speed limits apply and they are dumb for thinking that and wreck their cars and make traffic SLLLOOOOOOWWWW DOOOWWWWWWNNNNNNN. By slow down i mean stop completely and get detoured accross town.

SOOOO...because of the cancellation, I was unable to get a hold of PFP's notes. Yes. Tragic.

Now, some pictures! YAY!

This is MW crusin' at 75 on the freeway. Yeah, he's a milti-tasker.

Here is MW pointing and laughing at you know who....

And here is MW, "Are you seriuosly going to stop taking pictures of me?"

Alright, fine! You broke me! These pictures were all taken in a matter of seconds when I realized I didn't have that many pictures of him. Pictures that weren't taken courtesy of a 4 year old:

Did I mention that it's the cutest 4 year old ever??

He can read. And spell. And is pretty much smarter then me.

Here is his wonderfully snugglable little brother:

I'll have you know that MW played second fiddle to these boys THE ENTIRE trip. And don't let the adorableness fool you!! THese boys LOVE to read...and the sweet little baby likes to read the same book..over...and over...and over!

Dora: "Hola. I'm dora, and i have to take my books back to the library. Can you help me?"
Little Sweetness: "Yeess"
Dora: "Great! Let's get started."

I have never read a book so many times...But how can you resist!!?

Ohh, yeah...MW!? I almost forgot about him! ;)

December 05, 2005

FINE...Here's ya' dahn post!

I thought it would be a great idea to take all my pictures off of my computer and put them on an external hardrive. SO I did! Now, I can't blog pictures in bed. GREAT PLAN.

So this post will have to due.

I'm sure you may remember her from such posts as

Have I Tamed the Wild Best & Ok I Think She Thinks I'll Feed Her.

Please welcome, ladies and gentlemen, with a great round of applause, My PFP (Personal Food Pillager) in another ground-breaking performance called....

"Can I Borrow Your Computer for a Sec"

I was writing a paper that was due by 4 on line. It was 1:50 when here she came (our class started at 2. And yes, i was planning on writing the paper in class.)

PFP: "Hey!"
HG: "Hi! What's up? :)"
PFP: "Uhh...Do you have internet on there?"
HG: "Yeah, I do."
PFP: "Could I borrow it for a sec? I really have to do something on WebCt and I completely forgot!?"

Let me tell you that PFP has the tendency to make HUGE deals out of nothing. EVERY time we get an assignment/test back she braces herself for the UNKNOWN! She will look at me like she's waiting for a pregnancy test and needs support. We all KNOW full and well that she is going to get an A or a B, so what's the BFD? I play along. Cause I'm nice. And deep down I want her to let me borrow her notes for the take home final cause she rules at taking them. So, sue me. I'm extra nice cause she's got the goods.

HG: "Sure..."

PFP borrowed my computer and went on and on about how amazing it was that i had internet without a cord. Ok..? How was your trip from 1998?...Had she really not grasped wireless yet?

10 min later!

Class is starting and I REALLY need to finish this paper.

I look over and PFP is filling out a SURVEY!? A survey about the ON-LINE course that she had just finished!? NO LATE ASSIGNMENT. NOTHING FOR CREDIT. A FLIPPING SURVEY. SHE NEEDED MY COMPUTER TO GIVE SOMEONE ELSE HER OPINION. Now, you're trying to tell me that you DESPERATELY needed to use my computer!?

She looks at me and says...

PFP: "ooh..there's like 20 more questions...Is that ok?"
HG: "I really need to write a paper..."
PFP: "Oh. I'll hurry."

I guess the fact that I REALLY needed to finish my paper was the green light to continue working on this stupid freaking survey.

She finished the survey and apperantly forgot to save some of her answers. The SECOND she pressed submit she was in a tissy.

PFP: "Oh my gosh?! I CAN NOT believe it!? I really tried hard to give them my opinion.!? What am I going to do."
HG: "It's really not a big deal. It's not even for credit."

So..I get my comptuer back.

5 min later

PFP: "Can i read you my speech?"
HG: "uhh..yeah, sure...if you don't mind me typing."
PFP: proceeds to read a 5 min speech in JAPANESE!??

I give her my wow, great job speech and move on.

She then takes the next 5 minutes to explain EXACTLY what she said to me in Japanese. And on top, how I could have said it differently.

Sigh.... She's starting to grow on me.

December 02, 2005


Well, you all know that I saw Mr. Wonderful over thanksgiving so I'll give you a recap of how AMAZING it was.

After riding on the bus for 5 hours I was excited all PROPER-like! I finished most of a paper, until my battery died, and slept for about 10 minutes. How could I sleep!? I was meeting the man of my DREAMS and I hadn't seen him for like 6 years!?

I DID manage to meet a super cool chick that became my partner in crime for the bus ride. That was the only good thing that came of Greyhound.

SOO...ON with the show.

I waited about 5 minutes for him (his brother in-law, and two ADORABLE nephews) to pull up to the station. He got out of the car and, can i tell you, he was MORE beautiful in person!? But I won't cause beautiful isn't a GUY word so i'll say HANDSOME!! Or AMAZING LOOKING!!

Attraction? CHECK!
Hotness? CHECK!

Now for the hug....a HUGE tell-all instant. Was there chemistry?? DUN DUN DUNNHHH!!

When he smiled, all i could see was the excitement I was feeling. When we hugged......

Chemistry?? (here's for my ladies in the back...) CHECK, CHECK, CHECK!!! :)

We spent the first couple hours acting like smitten First Graders!? What the heck...who does that!? haha We were both so excited that it was finally happening...


Mr. Wonderful and I met 7 years ago when we worked at the movie theater.

I was 16 in highschool. He was 18 and graduated. I always liked cute Mr. Wonderful and we ALWAYS loved working with eachother. (He liked me, too! But what graduate dates a high schooler!? ;) HOWEVER, we never admitted that we had eyes for eachother and did our best to deny it to ourselves.

Moving on: We both went to the same community college a year later. (He wore running shoes in a completely sexy way!! And he was an athlete! And had a goergeous smile! And I would talk to him about crap i did not care about..JUST to talk to him! :)...and he did NOT catch my drift.)

I had a serious boyfriend..we now call him Marshmellow. He had a serious girlfriend...we now call her Cyste. Different places in our lives...but still very much attracted. Nothing ever happened.

Flash forward to two months ago, or, 5 years later: Mr. Wonderful found me on Facebook. I got his message and was INSTANTLY excited!! We talked on AIM and I was in love! :) There was the same instant attraction. The same GREAT communication. The same understanding. I was in TOTAL shock that there was someone (so dang GOODLOOKING, i might a) that I could talk to so easily. He made me laugh! He understood me without me explaining myself. It was EASY.

Ok. So we were talking...and falling in L-O-V-E...oooooooOooooOooohhhh!! And we decided it was time to see eachother! I packed my bags and headed down to see him.


Ok, so there we were! FINALLY together! And it was perfect.

I couldn't stop looking at him! I can't remember the last time I felt so happy.

Well...the whole vacation was perfect.

(All pictures courtesy of his 4 year old nephew! And Mr. Wonderful told me to tell you he is doing the tongue roll...and does not have giant freak lips!?)

We love to be goofy! We love the same movies. We love the same music. We love just being with each other.

We did the holiday thing. Went to a movie...went shopping...spent time with family...played drinking games! :) (well, he did....and that's aother story.)

We ended up renting a car on the last few days so we could spend more time together. Also, i couldn't handle taking the bus again. Iickckch!

We drove 5 hours to his house and it felt like 2. i met his friends. I saw where he lived.

(...that is a chunky sweater that nobody told me i looked giant in!)

And BEST of all...I smelled like him when I got home. **sigh**

Why is he so great? And why are we SO great together?

Ok...I've got to get ready for work, so I'll leave you with this....

This is one of the funniest drunk girl skits ever! Enjoy!

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November 29, 2005

Atlanta Bus Depot A.K.A "HELL"

Soooo...I decided that riding a bus from Atlanta to South Carolina would beat the heck out of paying $600 to fly directly into S.C. I also decided that the bus depot wouldn't be that bad. I was right about beating the 600...but WRONG, DEAD WRONG about the bus depot.


Here's how it went:

I arrived at the airport with about 3 hours to spare before catching a bus to the Atlanta Depot. I went to the Greyhound Bus TRAILER (uh, yes, I said trailer)to have my will-call ticket printed up.

CREEK((the door opens))

Blank stare from Greyhound employee. Am trying not to make completely disgusted face. The room is foul and humid with Miss Employee of the year's hangover breath.

HG: Uhh...Hi...I'm supposed to catch a bus at noon."

Her: Wide eyes...annoyed...waiting for me to finish.

HG: um...where am i going to be doing that?

Her: Rat back thurr...B'hind this heah' traila' But it ain't fa' three hou-ahs.
I am clearly the biggest idiot she's seen all day. And her two little friends agree. It is freezing outside and i guess I best be findin' me somewhere ELSE to keep warm. I am NOT welcome in the trailer to wait.

I felt so unwelcomed and ready to get the hell out of there, that i forgot to print my tickets.

2.5 hours later I head back to hangover heaven for my ticket. The bus will arrive behind this heah' trailah in 30 minutes and I don't want to miss it.

I am greeted at the LOCKED door by a hand written sign that says "BE BACK 12:30." My bus LEAVES at 12:30. She has neglected to shut the blinds and I see her sitting in a chair...legs on the crooked on her shoulder...and food shoveling into her mouth. She sees me and makes NO motion to put her LUNCH BREAK on hold. LUnch break!?? Lunch break!? What has she done that she needs a lunch break?

I tell the bus driver my predicament when he arrives and i have no printed ticket:

BusDRIVER: "Damn lazy asses! I don't have tahm fah this crap. You gawn and tell the station whatcha told me."

I get on the bus without a ticket.

There is a young girl...I guess about 18...with a newborn baby. When we get off the bus I offer to help her carry some stuff.

She accepts my help and gets off the bus and puts her baby...very haphazardly...into the carrier and walks COMPLETELY away to get her luggage. UHH ARE YOU SERIOUS!? I take this opportunity to wrap the baby in warm blankets and adjust her comfortably in the carrier. And I'm talking NEW-BORN people! And she LEFT her..UNATTENDED...with a stranger!

Ok, now are you ready for the DEPOT? I said, "ARE YOU READY FOR THE DEPOT?!" That's better.

I had NO idea what I was about to encounter. Imagine, if you will, a can of sardines. But replace the can with a SMALL bus depot..and the sardines with HUMANS.

It is NOT an exaggeration when i say WALL TO WALL PEOPLE.

On top of being PACKED, there was NOTHING posted about where we were supposed to be. You couldn't move..let alone with your luggage. IT was survival of the fittest and I, apperantly, was the person to ask for help. I had about 7 people come up to me and ask how to read their tickets and where to go. The only way to find out was to get in this HUGE line and ask one of the TWO employees. I almost asked one of them to print me off an info sheet so I could direct some of the traffic.

Now...for the tour of this luxurious facility.

First stop, the restrooms:

BHECH!! is it REALLY that hard to wipe that off?!

And what about this!?:

It's just a shame I can't post the smell.

Now on to the gift shop! What joy.

Come one! Come all! Get 'em while they're hot! From Friendship, plastic, hang thingys, to cheaply made figurines, we've got'em all! And check out those unbeatable prices! I bet they pale in comparison to the quality!!

Attention gentlemen! Don't let lack of planning stop you from telling the woman you love that you want to spend the rest of your life with her! We've got engagement rings from 4.99 and up! Atlanta has a way of bringin' out the romance. What about a bracelet. The gift that keeps on giving....with our brilliant green residue, she'll never forget that you got her that gift! Even when she takes it off. And yeah, real gold does that!?

Get ya' snow globes heah! Get ya' cigarettes heah!! Don't foget'cha quality greyhound toy bus fah tha kiddies! We've got shot glasses! We've got mugs! And Ladies, NOthin' says i love you like a commemerative eagle clock!

November 27, 2005

I'm alive!

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone! I'm a little late, but I've been in South Carolina...visiting Mr. WONDERFUL!! :) Everything went PERFECT...better then expected...!!!!

More details later.....Hope to talk to you all soon!

November 21, 2005

Oh no she didn't!!

I went to the bar last night.

I left the bar.

I found THIS right outside my car door!!!!!

Spotlight courtesy of the cop that was parked right next to me. ...Seriously.

HG: "Sir, would you mind shining your light on it so I can take a picture?"

COP: " you want it on the puke, or the bra?"

HG: "Right above both would be great!"

COP: "There you go....Have a good night!"

HG: "You too, sir, thanks."


November 19, 2005


I'm leaving on Tuesday morning at 5am!? That means I'm leaving Monday night. I have a night class that lets out at 8pm. LOVELY.


Allergies hurt!!!

BAD headache... :( WOE IS ME!

You KNOW it's a bad headache when excedrine won't cure it....

November 15, 2005

To cut...Or not to cut!?

That is the question... SHOULD HG get a hair cut?

(PS I'm not wearing mascera or blush!! SO THERE!)

I feel that the length may be getting a bit out of hand. You be le judge.

Front complete with fake smile and horrible, self timing, photo position...

Back with a pony tail- couldn't reach my arm far enough. You should've seen some of the other shots i got....

Right now it's all one length...I'm thinking maybe layers? Or a little shorter.....What d'ya think?

In My Mind I'm Gone To Carolina.....

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I love James Taylor...but that's not what I'm talking about. In exactly one week I will be heading to North Carolina! To see Mr. Wonderful!!

To all of my blog-friends- I know him...I was friends with him before....and I am not going to meet someone I JUST met on the internet! Also, yes, my dad does know about this. :)

Sooo...News about me? HOMEWORK. I have 4 things that i have to do for tomorrow and 10 things that i need to do for next week. I don't understand why ANYONE has class next week! It's Thanksgiving!?!?

With that...I will retreat to my cave where I will be doing homework and wishing I was somewhere else.

November 10, 2005

My backkk.....

I fell yesterday!! Yes, I fell! I was asleep under the stairs, on this carpeted platform thing we have at school, when i crawled out and attmpted to stand up.


Purse contents scatters....

Fall to knees under heavy contents of stupid backpack....

Can't pull myself up! lol

Two guys ( that a word!?) assist me with standing...while some other poor guy shuffles the contents of my purse back together.


In my defense:

My backpack weighs 27lbs! AND THIS IS A SKINNY SCALE that weighs LESS then the dr's WRONG scale. :)

Tis the reason for my fall and my yummy back spasms I presume.

November 08, 2005


Visible Panty Line.

I can think of very few exceptions to this being a NO-NO!

My case in point.

Under NO circumstances will this be fun to see.

She was WAY too pretty to be puttin' it all out there like that!

Have I Tamed the Wild Beast!?**Updated PS**

She's at it again. My PFP (Personal Food Pillager).
(Please keep in mind that I will do my best to recreate this verbatim.)

I got to class today and brought another bag of chips and a sandwich.

I opened my bag of chips.

Reached in for the first one.

Aimed the chip towards my mou-----


I HADN'T EVEN HAD ONE!! Deep breath.


..........4 min later...........
She's spent the last 240 seconds avoiding eye contact with my potato skins:

"May I please have another??? :) " Practically begging.

Ok, honestly....

......Another 3 minutes later......

I kid you NOT!

"((whines like huge grin)) PLEASE...Just one more!"

THAT'S IT! Keep in mind this was a very nice sarcastic tone but who flipping WHINES LIKE A DOG!? WHO DOES THAT!?!? So now, HG gets some balls:

" need to start bringing food for me! Cause every time I see you you're eating my lunch."

She freaking looks at me like I just flipped out for no reason.

"I can bring you food, that's no problem."

NO! You're right!!! That's NOT the problem...because I don't want YOUR food...I want MY food!!!! To which I say:

"They're only like 75 cents in the vending machine. Why don't you get some sometime?"

Her..."I can buy you a bag next time."

"No, I guess I should buy an extra one for you. haha"

....5 minutes later....

I end up getting pretty full and am starting to feel bad (FOR SOME WEIRD REASON.) So I offer her the rest of the chips:

"Here, I'm really done with them. Do you want the rest?"

"Are you sure!?" (Like...I saw how you just freaked out and I don't want you FREAKING out again. )

Can you believe this!? Well, it gets better!!

I give her the chips.

She licks the bag clean and giggles and points to the back nutritional information label.

"Hee hee... Look at this!" SHe has just pointed out to me that each bag contains 1.75 servings.

WTH!? Ok, what exactly was her motive?! That I'm freaking, freaking out over nothing cause there's clearly almost 2 servings!? OR Omg, this little amount is 2 servings!?


Now...For what happens next, you may need to brace yourselves.

She laughs off the "joke" about serving size and SHAMELESSY ME GIVES ME THE TRASH!! THE EMPTY BAG!! That she CLEARLY felt "belonged" to me!! I could deal with it!!! WHY WOULD I WANT THE EMPTY BAG BACK!?

Uh uhhh, honey!! Those are YOUR chips now!!!

The girl next to me FINALLY intervened. I think she saw this whole thing go down and was a bit surprised at how uncouth my little friend actually was (is uncouth too strong?).

My new friend in the class said:

"Oh here, I'll throw that away for you!" (like, why the heck would she want with the empty bag that you just finished!)


I wonder what Wednesday will bring.

PS In response to your comments... I've tried passive aggressive and she clearly didn't get it! Or...maybe she's winning here and gets it just fine!?


November 04, 2005

Another word to the wise....

IF you eat a snack size version of Pizza Pringles and a regular size Hershey Bar for lunch....and then go running 10 minutes later....


"wow..this run is extremely difficult....did I swallow an anvil?...or a bowling ball?.....or a lead plate? huh."

Yeah...that's pretty much what it felt like.

November 03, 2005

For those inquiring!

We will call this mystery man NC...because that's where he's from. NC is sweet. NC is HILARIOUS. NC is cute, cute, cute and I'm going to visit!


And it is official...Our puppy is an old lady. She can't even keep up with me when I'm jogging....when I run, she pants after me like a little two year old ready for a nap.

Sweet doggy.

October 31, 2005

BLACK clouds...

This post was supposed to be up yesterday, but there's someone pretty awesome that has been distracting me from posting. ((blush)) Won't go into the details, now!

So here's the creepy storm that I drove into on my way to school yesterday:

THis was at 9am. It felt like 8pm. It was creepy! SEE:

Now take note to the small red mark on my bottom lip. I punched myself in the face with a glass rack because i am smart.

And, no, I'm not wearing make up! VOILA!

PS I've updated my song of the day which will appropriately be changed to song of the week soon. I've played this song before...but what can i say!?

October 28, 2005

For those of you that think I'm evil.

About my personal food pillager.
I'm not a bad person! I promise! Here's the deal: I bring food from home because I am POOR! When I buy chips that are 75cents a bag (approximately 10cents a chip!), I really wanted to spend my money on it! If she offered me food, I wouldn't mind! But she doesn't! Sigh. Please believe me.

Now, onto my sister who hates me and hates my diet. I came home to find THIS yesterday!.....

It was as moist and delicious as it looks. GRRRRrrrrrr!

October 26, 2005

OK, i think she thinks I'll feed her.

I was at the library about 2 weeks ago and was approached by a girl from my PoliSci class. Long story short, she talked my ear off!! Well, her real motive for being my friend has just reared it's ugly, starving head and I am not happy about it.

~~LIBRARY NIGHT~~~~~~~~~~~~

HER: Aren't you in my class?

ME: Yeah, hey.

HER: Do you mind if I join you?

ME: Yes I mind because I am sitting here enjoying my Ritz crackers and am working hard on this paper that should be done right now!? Sure.

I offer some crackers to my new friend and she proceeds to HELP HERSELF in every possible sense imaginable. We're talkin' half a sleeve of my Ritz, people.

The truth be told, I felt kind of bad for her. I had all this great study food and she didn't have anything. I felt empathy and warmth because I shared my food. I am such a good person.


I am eating a SMALL bag of the best, most-delicious chips EVER (TGIF Potato Skins), when in walks my new friend from the library. (Please note: before this date she sat comfortably on the other side of the room.)

HER: hey! (Locks eye contact with my chips, gives an 'ooh, what're we havin' today' look, and then helps herself! Again! But this time, WITHOUT ASKING!! Did you hear me? SHE DIDN'T EVEN ASK!)

Let's get something straight, right now! I was eating a SMMAAALL bag. THe kind with 8 chips. A snack for one! Only to be shared with a best friend, significant other, or small starving child! What is up with you!

It was after she ate my chip that she decided to move her PERMENANT seat in the room to right next to me.

Great. :)


Class has started and we are getting a lecture. I eat my sandwich quietly and then switch to my almonds.

HER: Oooh...whatcha' eatin? (Now, she mumbles this as she's avoiding eye contact and darting her eyes straight for my backpack which holds the goods.)

ME: What??? ( What do you want?? Did you say something??)

HER: (bashful and did she hear me? Then she says) You're funny..hehe.

WTH!??? Like you didn't just ask me for food? Well it ain't gonna happen, babe!!! Don't even think of it! I'm not your personal soup kitchen!!!

So this I say to you my stalker!!!!

In the nicest way possible. TRULY THE NICEST WAY.


October 24, 2005


I've just boarded my flight home from Tuscon.

I have a People magazine.

I'm in an aisle seat with NO ONE in the middle

........... WHEN HERE HE COMES.

My Plane-date for the next 2-3 hours of my life.

I am a polite woman and ALWAYS give up the aisle seat for a man thrice my size which this guy was. Just to give you all a good look at what I would be spending the next few hours of my life with, please click the following link and adjust the playback speed to it's fastest: My dream plane-date.


So, welcome back.

I will now tell you the horror.

This man would NOT leave me alone!!

After succumbing to the fact that I was NOT going to be reading any time soon, I began what would go down in history as the WORST conversation of all time!

1) He notices that I am white knuckled on the take off, so suggests that we take my mind off of things and share our worst plane rides ever. Lovely remedy for someone about to have a panic attack.

HIS STORY: Bad turbulence.

MINE: A fat guy getting toilet paper stuck in his pants.

Now, I thought my story was funny. THis really fat guy gets a note from a steward that tells him he has toilet paper stuck in his pants (TRUE STORY).

Gross Plane Guy (aka plane-date) , however, DOES NOT THINK THIS IS FUNNY.

GPG: THAT IS DISGUSTING!!!!!! I cannot believe it!!! He had TOILET PAPER!?! (faces like throwing up in mouth at any moment) Whenever I do PAPERWORK I ALWAYS use a washcloth to wipe!!......

There are 3 major things wrong with this situation...

1) He is talking to me about wiping his BUTT.
2) He calls a #2, "paperwork"
3) I think he shaves his legs.

What GPG does next is unacceptable and I would not be shy to call it the worst thing imaginable.

(GPG reaches down to his fanny pack .........unzips slowly............and shows me a zip lock baggy with a terry cloth wash rag.)



GPG has just shown me................................



To which two questions arise:

1) Am I on candid camera!?
2) What does GPG do with soiled washcloth?

The rest of the plane ride was filled with lovely little nuggets about GPG.

GPG is a stripper.

GPG Owns an "escort" service that evil Tuscon is forever trying to destroy. "I don't hire prostitutes!" he said, "But, Hey, things happen, you know!?"

Yes, GPG, I do know. Terrible, horrible things happen. The nerve.

I find out GPG can't read too well.

I find out GPG's marriage has had it's ups and downs.

I find out that GPG's step-son watches MTV and farts in front of the television. To WHICH GPG STRONGLY DETESTS. "GO TO THE BATHROOM!?" I don't think it would be a stretch to say that GPG had a bad experience with poop.

I also find out that GPG is not so great at driving in snow and almost killed 6 of his co-chip'n'dalesers.

I was his therapist for the duration of the flight nad I am forever scarred.



October 23, 2005

Please Watch Responsibly... :)

If you watch this....please watch with the sound up. lol The sound effects really are what make this priceless.... lol.

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October 21, 2005

RIP Wonderful long post!

I had a beautiful post all ready and awesome and wonderful and witty and great and long! Then PPOOOOOOFF! Gone! Vanished! Into thin blog-air! It had pictures. It was funny! And now I have no idea what I wrote cause it was so aweseome and long.

You will pay for this blogger! You will pay.

SO now I will try to rehash the awesomness that was my previous post. (So not going to happen)

I'm pretty excited that I get to drive 45 minutes to WORK FOR FREE tomorrow. Once again my International Human Rights class gets me to go above and beyond! (PS GOT AN A ON THE TEST! WHAT WHAT!?) 20 hours of community service is what it's all about.

Must sleep. Need to leave my house at the BUTTCRACK to get there on time. Wonderful.

PS I'm still mad about my post! GRR!

October 19, 2005

Tell me you Love me Andrew!

Tell me.....You love me.

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HG Needs...

Got this game from Ms. Q. You go to Google and enter in "Your name + needs" then you post the top ten listings. Here is what I came up with lol.

HG needs.....

...a cold shower. (Very much the opposite.)
...a smack daddy. (Hmm..)
...him (Agreed) do five things. (much more then that.)
...a tutor. (Not this semester) (Sometimes..) be improving. (always)
...a bumper sticker. (I guess...)
...the earth energy in her life to learn how to ground and be more
practical... (You are now entering a world...doo doo dooh doohhh....)
heavy visual depiction of her subject in order for it all to work. (This is my secret...if it sounds like I am taking over the earth you may be on to something.....)

One Down...Two to Go

Ok, one test is out of the way and I have anohter one in about 45 minutes. Then another one after that. Then a human rights class that I have NOT done the reading for and then I get to work... BLACGH......

:) All smiles from this end of the blogosphere. Let you know how things pan out.

October 18, 2005


Midterms are here and I am PROCRASTINATING. For some reason, I have no sense of urgency to get anything done. I had a test today and i have 3 tomorrow.

Wish ME luck. @_@

Does that look like a zombie-eyed person? lol...ok, that's what it's supposed to be.

October 17, 2005

Thank you, again, WB.

Well, just another reason to thank the WB. They have provided me with an awesome song. (I know, I know...but I don't listen to the radio. I'm sure it's been out for months or something crazy like that.)

If I had a boyfriend. This would be our song. If I had a husband, a date, a guy friend that--...ANYTHING!? hehe This would definitely be his song dedicated to me.

Enjoy.....any takers?

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Welcome home.

This guy scared the heck out of me when i got home tonight. Isn't he so cute! :)

October 15, 2005

My Car Smells Like Ribeye.

I couldn't figure out why my car stunk so bad. I didn't leave food in there. I didn't eat in there. But it stunk like my work!? This morning I found a black towl that we use to wipe our hands off at work....UNDER MY SEAT. Delicious! Tartar sauce...bearnaise.....drawn butter.... YUM!

October 13, 2005

Why can't I wake up early?

I wish I was a morning person! When I get up, I love it. But that just so happens to not ever, rarly ever be the case! No earlier then 1030...

October 12, 2005


Ok, this stupid paper is FINALLY finished. Here's a recap starting at about 33o this morning.

330am: FINISHED PAPER! Angels singing.

332am: That's funny, it won't save.

333am: That's less funny, NOTHING will open.

334am: Awesome let me try to save it to my USB Stick.

335am: EVERYTHING WIPED OFF OF USB STICK. Including old version of paper. Could be royally whipped!

336am: Reboot Computer. NOTHING.

337am: am royally whipped.

9:30am: Freaking out to teacher. She appears to understand, but I feel like she thinks I'm lying!!? Like those times when you forget your ID and the JERK lady at the fair looks at you like you're some PUNK kid trying to scam and buy beer! Cause, hey, this is the fair.

9:34am: Dad saves the day! ALL IS GREAT

300pm: Get home from school and only half my paper saved.


Thanks to Billy, I now give you a more accurate picture of what I looked like last night. :) Thank you!