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September 02, 2005

Is this weird?

Ok, I don't obsess over my weight, BUT I DO hate it when my figure goes all capoooey. I need you all to tell me if what I do is weird....

When I'm feeling gross, (like when I've just spent the last 3 days eating nothing but refined sugar-animal crackers-M&M's-bagels-Smores Bars- Blueberry Muffins- ETC ETC ETC!!! THIS LIST DOESN'T END !!.....) I try to gently steer myself back on track with a little reminder to eat better.

I, Humor Girl, wear underwear that is 2 sizes too small when i feel fat!!!

THERE! I SAID IT! ARE YOU HAPPY NOW!?

I bought these underwear from walmart, got them home, and realized I bought the wrong size. I was going to take them back...but never did. They're really cute...but were brilliantly hand-crafted to cinch EVERY place that my body stores fat!? They're uncomfortable, I hate them, and I feel sloppy at the sight of them. Even on skinny days they make me feel depressed.

Anyway, just wanted your opinion:

IS it weird that I wear TOO-TIGHT underwear to make me stop eating bad??

I would tie a string around my finger but I can't handle the scrutiny!!

"Hey, what's the string for HG?" Now choose your fate!!!!

1. LIE- and walk around with the guilt.

2. Tell the truth- and have people whisper around about what a compliment fisher I am. WHICH I AM NOT!

....Did I just blog this?

24 comments:

Destiny Anne said...

hahahahahahahahahahahahah!!!!!!!! thats hilarious! i cannot believe that u just told everyone that u wear underwear thats two sizes 2 small!!!!!! hahahahahahahhaahahhahahahahahah!!!!!!!! woo! i'm gonna be laughing for a long time now.

Humor Girl said...

lol....ONLY ON FAT DAYS DA!!

Earth Rooster said...

Now THAT is funny!

I just don't understand the situation, well. Not only because I am male, but because I haven't gained any weight for 17 years.

I can't believe you said that! I, too, am going to be laughing all day about that.

ben.run said...

I haven't tried wearing underwear that is too tight, though I did have a pair that was too big, I could never understand it why some days felt "a little slack". This went on for months until I noticed one day that the label of a pair said "L", rather than all the others which had "M".
"Ahh ha" I said, "That explains the slack days".

Sorry for an entirely irrelevant comment :-)

Ben.

Ida Marie said...

That is pretty funny. Though I have never gone that far, we all do odd things when we feel a little less than our normal selves. I am the type that dresses in baggy big clothes and don't fix my hair or wear make-up. And I will tell you, it's not pretty.

MB said...

My underwear is mostly too big now. But I hate tight underwear and won't wear it. It makes me feel fat before I even start my day. And that's a bad thing!

midwest_hick said...

hmmmmm.....I'm thinking a picture would be required to properly 'assess' this situation...lol.....(I highly doubt ya have a weight problem tho)

Bek said...

well, thats weird, but probably not any weirder than what i have done when i feel fat - i smell food. just open a pkg of cookies or cheese puffs and take a big whiff. then tell myself "mmmm. that was yummy." as if i ate it.

KV said...

You look fine.

MG said...

To look at you, I guess you don't wear the kiddies clothes too often then.

PINKSandROSES said...

doesn't that hurt your butt?

Jeremiah said...

Ah, I vote for wierd :0). Hey, whatever floats your boat. If it works it works. I don't know if making yourself even more depressed by wearing them is going to help you though.

-RM said...

just as long as the circulation to your legs is okay....I hope so. Can we see pics of you in these underwear. It is totally okay..don't freak out. This is too funny I almost choked on my protein shake.

Jeremiah said...

Oh yeah, also look up the word "botch", I don't think you know what it means.

Humor Girl said...

Earth Rooster: Ah..Rub it in why don't you! lol

Ben Run: Lol..my ex-boyfriend had the same thing happen to him.

The Johnstons: Your talking about "hat days" ... :)

mb: me too... mostly!

Midwest: I'll see what I can do.. lol

Bek: A friend of mine (male) used to chew food up and then spit it out! He was cutting weight. He said: "Try it...It's like eating it." Yeah, it wasn't.

KV: you're always so sweet...BUT I promise I wasn't fishing for comliments! IT's a chick thing! :)

MG: You're correct. :)

Pinkandroses: No..it leaves red marks on my side though!

Jeremiah: I'm the botchiest person ever! :) Thanks!

RM: I'm not sure...but Midwest asked for the same thing...

Melissa H said...

Okay, I guess I'm just as mental because I think that's a BRILLIANT idea! You're constantly reminded why you don't want to eat that cookie but no one has to know it. :-)

Kent said...

Ouch. You know cutting off your circulation is not a healthy thing. That elastic waistband can cause some real uncomfort.

And yes, you are extremely strange for wearing small underwear but I still love you.

I've been feeling rather chubby lately myself, so what I do is limit myself to one meal per day. That's right, one meal. And in between when I get hungry--which is all the damn time--I drink water.

Jessie said...

I am going to Wal-Mart NOW!!!

allison said...

i don't think its weird at all! in fact i ordered some jeans online and they were way too tight but i wouldn't return them. i didn't care what i had to do i was going to fit in them!! good news is that i got into them. bad news is that they're too tight right now..but that'll change here in the next couple of weeks.

I like to write down everything i eat in a journal so i can see and eliminate some of the garbage i put into it. It really works.

Peri said...

that's funny. :)
yeah.......college stress........i start wanting to eat sugary foods like jelly beans.

Mama Duck said...

Girl...I have an entire drawer full of undies that haven't seen the light side of day since Daughter #1 was born.

Give yourself a break. :)

rcm said...

You should never do anything that induces depression or sadness of any kind. Look at it as a drawback of being American.

Karla said...

Eek. I can't imagine wearing something to make myself feel worse on my fat days :). That is some hard core punishment HG!

Cutting back on my kool aid fetish and resorting to drinking water is about as hard core as I get ;-)

JRT said...

Don't feel bad HG! My ever-growing pot belly is waging war with my size 36 pants that I bought 2 yrs ago because my size 34 pants were too tight. I'm currently considering thinking about trying to attempt to embark on an exercise regimen as we speak. Maybe I should take a page out of your book and wear women's underwear two sizes two small when I feel fat.